Pffffwoaaar these crabs aren't messing around.
Good news is I realized my AC is 22 without my shield, not 18. Bad news is that changes nothing.
I have... two very challenging grapple checks to make, now!
GrappleVs26 - (1d20+12)[22]
GrappleVs31 - (1d20+12)[30]
EDIT: *Squints at character sheet, craving some hidden bonuses.*
..Nuh.