Quote Originally Posted by Grytorm View Post
How cam I convince myself that I am not a jerk. I spent twenty minutes this morning after doing some volunteer stuff hiding behind a fence after recieving mipd social sanction because I should have picked up/shook out a rug before sweeping. And I could have spent that time talking to anyone. Which really doesnt make me seem like a jerk.

What kind of makes me feel like a jerk is the patterns in who I talk to and how after the volunteer thing is done I sort of mostly talk to the women I have crushes on (only one man works on staff so it is slightly less dumb). And really it appears I end up having crushes on almost any woman who is near my age that I talk to enough about things that interest me. And I tend to be more concientous about asking questions/discussing things not related to my interests which is good.

But usually I learn that they are already in a relationship and end up avoiding them because I consider myself an awful person even if they more likely than not had no idea of my idiocy.
Luckily for you, in my experience, anyone who asks if they are a jerk usually isn't. Something you could try is to ask someone on the staff (that you trust) if they think you are or not. If they say no, then all is fine, and if they say yes... Then you can ask follow up questions. When did I do it? What could I have done differently? Also, Apologize if you need too.