Personal Woes and Advice 6

[HalfTangible]

I feel the urge to vent about how my life has been going for the last couple of months.

By coincidence, worst stuff goes first.

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The day before Easter, my mother had a bad fall down the stairs and broke her one good leg. She spent weeks in the hospital and a few more weeks at a rehab center, during which I visited every day and fetched stuff for her when she asked. Which was basically every day. She's home now, but still unable to walk or get anywhere without her wheelchair.

While she was at the hospital, bro told me that she'd reeked of alcohol when she fell (I have very little sense of smell). She's had an alcohol problem for years, but since she was still basically able to function (i thought), I didn't think much of it. However, I asked, and apparently when she's drunk, it's indistinguishable from being tired. And I've been seeing her "tired" most every day over the last couple of years.

Which is kind of a huge moment of self-blame when you're the one who buys the alcohol.

Decided that I'm putting my foot down and not buying her crown anymore. She hasn't asked for any since her leg is still recovering, but I'm not looking forward to that conversation.

The bigger issue is that I am doing pretty much everything that she can't do herself. Which is most everything since she can't walk at all anymore

This is not helped by the fact that mother told me directly that she calls on me for everything because Dad spends most of his time in Russia and Bro is A) also working and B) about as reliable as a broken clock. (I do Uber, but I can drop in and out of that whenever I want, so it's not as much of an obligation as direct employment like bro.)

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My brother's best friend (I talked about this when it happened; you may remember him as Bill) was killed 3 years ago by a drunk driver, and 2 weeks ago the driver was supposed to have his sentencing hearing. I went to this hearing with my mother, brother, and about 50 to 60 other people (the judge was surprised at how crowded it was). About an hour after the hearing was supposed to start, we found out that the defense attorney was in another county and could not come because he was involved in a federal child sex case (as a lawyer, to be clear) and even if the case closed quickly he wouldn't be able to make it to the meeting. This was after the hearing was supposed to start, by the by, and a ton of the people there had flown in for this. So they tried to come up with a date everyone could show up again. I don't know what they decided but I'm pretty sure they still haven't resolved it.

This is not the first time that there's been a delay over this case. At this stage, I don't think anyone cares what sentence the guy gets, we just kinda want this to be over, if only for Bill's family.

Mom thinks that the lawyer in question called in a favor to get himself involved in a federal case to get this delayed on purpose. I'm not convinced at all.

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Dad's home.

Those of you who have been in this thread for a long while may recall that he and I do not get along and this trip back has been no exception. The guy ranges from angry at everything I do to condescending beyond belief.

Oh, and his job in Russia may be done, but he's going to Kazahkstan next for a multi-year job.

That sounds good until you remember that Mom's still got a broken leg.

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Every year around the 4th of July our family goes on vacation to a nearby city for about a week. Should be fun, right?

Eh... a few problems.

-Dad can't come this year due to timing w/his job
-Bro isn't coming because of... I don't even ****ing know, he doesn't tell me ****
-Mom still can't walk.
-Even when she could, I spend most of every family vacation running from place to place doing **** for them.

So yeah. Me and mom going to a family vacation wherein most of our family isn't going and I will spend most of it working.

Yaaaaay...

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To top it all off, I also have a couple summer classes that I need to do at the same time that I am having a bit of trouble with in part because there is so much to do every week and our professor changes the coding language we use with every assignment. The net connection up where I'm going for this family "vacation" is incredibly spotty (which is a problem when you need to do classes *online*)

I can try and request an extension, but I dunno if that'll actually fly with my professors.

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So yeah. Right at this moment there's **** in most every direction. It's not all bad (went to Anime Matsuri after the failed trial and it'll be nice to see people I know on vacation) but it's got a lot of bad.

I feel like a slave. Or at the very least, trapped.

None of this is anyone's fault but I still find myself blaming them for it.